19 February, 2008

Sh** Happens...Often

Hey team, welcome back. Well the 4 day weekend was sweet...for some of us at least. Lemme give you the skinny on the shinadigans fortune has been playing on us.
So Kristen and her sister went down to Southern Utah to drop off Jake, her little boy, at her ex-husbands house. It seemed to be a routine run; good weather, no previous car issues and a couple cases of Diet Coke in the back. Seemingly, this trip should be an enjoyable one. So Kristen and Jeanette drive our CRV down with no problem, drop Jake off and decide to head to Las Vegas for an enjoyable day of hanging out in the warm weather. Of course, that's when the trouble began.
As the car was nearing the Las Vegas Strip exit, the check engine light went on and Kristen gave me a call. I told her to find a Checker Auto or something and have them check it on their computer to see what the problem was. Well they didn't make it that far. They barely made it onto the Boulevard when the car shut down at a light and only started long enough to get enough momentum to coast it to the side of the road. Crap. If that wasn't bad enough, Las Vegas' finest and bravest roared up on his bicycle and demanded they move their car immediately. When they told him it was broken down, he gave them a very generous 30 min. to move it, or else he would be forced to ticket them. Jerk.
So long story short, the cop calls a tow truck for them and gets it picked up and on its way (with the girls in tow) to the nearest Honda dealership that I found for them. He was kind enough not to charge them for miles since he couldn't follow directions and went to the wrong dealership originally. After getting there, Kristen through swollen eyes and running mascara, demanded that she speak to Leonard, the service guy I had spoke to on the phone to make sure taking our car there would be ok. Leonard tried to tell her that he had no time to look at it, but Kristen was a mad man, deranged by the trauma of the day, and likely losing it from the makeup running down her face, into her mouth and absorbing into her brain. She demanded that he have a look because they needed to assess their situation. In the face of a huge estrogenized atomic bomb, he buckled and gave the car a quick once over, determining that the front right axle appeared to have popped out and likely ruined the transmission as a result. This is the same axle and transmission that we paid $2,250 to repair/replace in mid December. WHAT?!!! Leonard was kind enough to be straight with the girls and told them to get a rental car and go home, 'cause this thing was not going anywhere, anytime soon. He called the rental company to come pick them up and they were whisked to Enterprise by a half handicapped, black, freelance trucker named Troy.
Now Troy is is story...no a novel, in and of himself, so you'll have to talk to the girls to hear about that, but he got them to Enterprise who kindly informed them that they didn't do one-way rentals, the kind of rental they needed to go from Vegas to SLC...one way. So they were referred to the airport, 30 minutes away, where they could surely find a company who did. A cab was called and the $30 fare was scraped together when Troy, the half-handicapped, black freelance trucker offered to give them a ride for free. FABULOUS! A free ride and another 4 days worth of hilarious conversation ensued. His number was given to the girls "just in case" and Kristen and Jeanette were on their way.

As luck would have it again, one of the 30 rental companies had a one-way car available for them, a Prius; the burnt draft card of our generation. Good gas mileage was expected and delivered. What wasn't expected was the lack of comfort the Prius provides when trying to sleep in it. How did they find this out? They tried to sleep in of course. When they rolled into St. George late at night and couldn't find a free room thanks to the myriad events occurring in the thriving metropolis that is St. George, they decided to park it in a hospital parking lot. But then Kristen woke up to Jeanette moving somewhere else in the middle of the night. She felt "weird" and decided the hospital parking lot wasn't for the.
But they made it. They made it home alive and tired and they told me all about it for about an hour when the got home. They even included the important details about Kristen having to buy new makeup at Mac and Sephora with her tear stained and swollen face and how everyone thought she was some kind of car-sleeping crack addict. Well they were half right I suppose.