16 September, 2008

As If You Thought You'd Had Enough

Just when you think you've had your fill of blog posts, I reach in and rip the stitches out of your blog stuffed, gastric-bypassed stomach and feed you more. (That was a strangely disturbing analogy.)
My foot/feet have been in the news a little lately and apparently they are trying to keep the PR ball rolling. All press is good press right?
This weekend, I got fed up with one of those bi-fold, slatted, accordian closet doors that people use when they dont have room for a full swing out, normal door. I had pulled it off for Kristen to paint last weekend and got fed up with it just sitting around. So I says to myself, I says, "I watch Flip This House, I think I can fix this." So I pull the door out of the corner and start "handymanning" away at getting it reinstalled. Well if you've ever taken anything apart that you couldn't get back together, you'll know how I felt. It just wasn't going to remount. Apparently the floor had raised up a 1/4 in or so over the past week because the door was just too tall all of a sudden to fit vertially. So I did the only thing a sane and rational person would do in an unfixable situation like this....

...I kicked it. Really hard. And just to be sure it knew how upset I was, I punched it and threw it to the floor, ultimately breaking it. Not once, or twice, but three times broke it. When I threw it to the ground it kinda just poo-pooed like a little school girl and tapped out. When I punched it, I knocked about 4 slats out of the...er, slatted front of it, breaking it quite badly and when I kicked it, well I just really hurt myself more than anything. Pretty painfully in fact. That was probably the only part of it I regret. It still hurts. Oh, I guess I regret screaming profanities and slamming it into the floor moments before our landlord knocked on our door to give us the power bill. But he's about 80 years old and as cute as a kitten, so I doubt his hearing is as sharp as the pain piercing through my foot right now.

5 comments:

Lauren said...

haha logan you kill me

Cuzin Tiff said...

you are one funny dude!!!!I can picture you kicking the poor defenseless door and stomping it to death like a cute little 2 year old....hahhaha i am still laughing

Leslierush said...

your posts just make me laugh out loud to myself and then Lee looks at me with a "your kinda weird" look on his face...thanks buddy. hey i need your google account email cus i'm takin the blog private, i mean if you wanna read it that is.

Jake said...

That "Mormon Blog" makes me sick.

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