16 February, 2010

And We're Back

Hey there. Remember me? Sure you do. I'm the one that had a mental breakdown a couple months ago. What's that you say? Yes, yes it was actually exactly 2 months ago that I blogged last.
Did I plan this, you ask, coming back to the blog on the exact two-month anniversary of my departure? We'll, yes and no.
When I realized I could triumphantly return on a quasi important date, I figured why not. I needed a little push and hitting the blog on a specific date seemed to fulfill that requirement.

So here it is. Nothing spectacular. Nothing grandiose. Just me saying hello. I had wanted to chat with you about my frustrations with bar soaps and body washes that are marketed specifically to men. I really had because I'm terribly frustrated. So frustrated in fact that I've invented a new kind of bar soap.
But we won't get into that.

I'll be honest, I jammed the living daylights out of my right-hand ring finger this morning playing basketball at the city rec center. The pain and swelling has proven prohibitive to say the least. Not to mention that I feel sick and toasty still from some serious over exertion.

If you know me, you know I don't play basketball. Not in the sense that I literally do not play it, but that I am physically, emotionally and spiritually incapable of successfully participating in it. I try, I really do try, but all the genes inside of me that allowed me win a jr. golf tournament for my age bracket back in the day have forced out any possibly of me carrying basketball genes as well.

So essentially, I run around. Or jog. Well really I just end up walking and using my pervasive sweating to dissuade other players from getting too close to me. Oh, and I sure yell a lot. I'll hustle as close as I can to someone who is about to shoot and then yell something monosyllabic like, "HAYBSHSTAK!" and throw an arm or two in the air. It's kind of pathetic, by my friends are glad to have me there.

And really that's what it all comes down to. So to call out my homies:
(But for all that is good and holy, give me a week or so to recover.)