17 July, 2008

Why The Seasons Suck



I was laying in bed a couple nights ago, plugging in my phone to charge, letting the cool breeze of my oscillating fan chill my fat, muggy flesh. The summer is cruel to large people like me. Unrelenting heat and soaring energy prices are causing boob sweat in husky men everywhere. Without my fan, I'd be lost.
As I rolled to my back, ticking up the volume on Style Channel's Clean House, I contemplated the depressive nature of the 4 seasons.
Winter is cold, summer is hot and there's a couple in between the two with a little bit of both; never predictable, never consistent. But the sadness doesn't come from air temperature or barometric pressure, it comes from the progression of time.
Thanks to the seasons, it's a cinch to catch yourself saying, "last summer..." or "this time last year..." or "remember where we were..." Is this bad? No, not really; not unless the particular season you're currently in is sucking.
Personally, that muggy, sweat covered moment in front of my fan and the TV was an eye opener...I'm getting old. There's really no debating my hair-loss anymore, no questioning the health risks I'll begin to face and no skirting the questions about when we're going to have kids.
MTV has grown annoying and scripted. I miss cartoons, tree forts and a life devoid of any form of responsibility. Maturity, cleanliness and responsibility are way overrated. I'm ready to be a kid again. Give me old school Nickelodeon, TGIF, MC Hammer pants and a tubes full of pogs, because Fall is just around the corner and I don't know if I can take another season.

2 comments:

Leslierush said...

oh goodness i could not agree more. last month i actually forgot how old i was for about 10 mintues i just couldn't figure out and when i realized i was indeed 24 i was shocked. why do i still feel 18? here at WSU they do orientations all summer for the freshmans starting this fall. On my morning walk i passed a bunch of them and I thought "what are all these junior high kids doing here." then I realized they were all at least 17 or 18. When did this happen and are they looking at me going "whoa look at that old lady." I just missed the part when I grew up and it depresses me daily.

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